Janet CollinsCalling People at Night
April 13th 2009 19:53
Is it OK to call people late at night? There used to be a sort of unwritten curfew to phoning and, in my family at least, it was 8:30. Calling any later, unless of course it was an emergency, was simply bad manners.
There was also another unwritten rule with the telephone and that was to avoid phoning people at meal times, particularly dinner time. Maybe that's not important anymore because dinner times were once more standard and the rule was probably made when dinner time was around 6:30 or 7:00.
Times have changed though and a lot many more of us have irregular working hours or definitely don’t work from nine to five. Dinner times can be different for everyone and even may vary from night to night.
When it comes to late night phone calls, a relative once told me that late phone calls made him nervous because he always thought something bad had happened to someone. So phoning a person late a night can cause angst, even if it is quite unintended.
While there probably isn’t any hard and fast rule for this anymore, I still often am very reluctant to phone someone after 8:30 unless I know them very well and am sure they are quite happy to have a call a little later than most. Some of my friends and family tend to stay up late and probably enjoy having a phone call at that time because they can have a relaxing chat. For others I will always ensure it’s not too late before I call.
Meal times are a bit harder. They vary so much from household to household but it’s probably not a good idea to call someone before 7:30 at night. Unfortunately, sometimes night time is the only time many of us will be able to catch each other at home with enough time to chat, if that’s what the phone call is about.
For simple calls, of course, texting has certainly eased some pressures in timing phone calls appropriately and often this can eliminate the dilemmas in picking the right time to call.
Watching the time you call someone is probably just as important as making the call itself. What’s your rule? Do you have a cut off time for making phone calls?
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Comment by the world of gaye
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Comment by Janet Collins
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I too still think about whether or not a person will be having dinner before I call and I don't call most people late at night unless we have both agreed to talk then.
Thank you for your thoughts.
Comment by Janet Collins
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I tend to be a late night person so I loathe people calling me early too. I hated texting when I first tried it too but have now grown very fond of both receiving and sending text messages. They certainly make time really unimportant and you can still get the message through.
Thanks for the comment.
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Comment by Janet Collins
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I actually don't mind chatting on the phone late at night but I am always mindful that other people don't like it and it can be pretty impolite to ring people after 8:30 or 9:00.
Sometimes, as you have obviously found out, something needs to be said if you find a late call intrusive. Some people just don't realise.
Good to see you and thank you for the comment.
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Comment by Janet Collins
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That's a great topic for another post. That's just it. People think because their phone is in their pocket that it is OK to call someone while they're at dinner with someone else.
Frankly, if I went to dinner with someone and they called someone else, it would want to be REALLY important because otherwide it's just plain rude.
Thanks for that.
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Comment by Janet Collins
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I like your screening idea, too. Ah, the wonders of modern technology.
Thanks for the visit.
Comment by Lilla
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I like this topic and agree. If my phone rings after 8.30pm I don*t answer it. . . not my mobile either. Too bad and if someone has died? well they*ll still be dead in the morning, too. usually people leave a text anyway and i can never work out why they don*t do that in the first place?
I have to agree with the meal times too, especially when those calling me know I have family to feed.
I think the best evening practice for the phone calls is certainly between 7.30 and 8.30pm and ONLY IF IT LIFE OR DEATH!
. . . and not befor 7am either . .
Lilla ..
Comment by Janet Collins
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Ahaha! You are certainly right about the dead person. He or she would still be dead the next day so what could be so important to call late.
And I'm with you on the "before 7am" rule too.
Janet
Comment by Tracy
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Too bad and if someone has died? well they*ll still be dead in the morning, too.
Hilarious, I like your way of thinking!
Tracy
Comment by Morgan Bell
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most people i know have mobiles, and turn them off or on silent when theyre asleep, so i literally ring any time of the day or night and just leave a voicemail if i cant get them
if you are ringing someone for the first time and you know they have a family and get up early in the morning, it is always a point of confusion as to how you can ring not at dinner time and not to late . . . it seems like theres a 15min window between 8:30 and 8:45
i wouldnt ring my parents after 10pm
Comment by Janet Collins
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I think pretty much along these lines too. Most of the people I call at home I know pretty well and I know they're routines.
I do think there are lots they don't think about the time. I often see people ringing others quite late and I don't think they know them all that well.
It would have to be an emergency for me to ring my parents after 10pm, although up until that time they're pretty cool with it.
Comment by Jason King
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I believe that closest friends can call you up to 10.30pm if they know me and that I will be up but it still pisses me off when they call.
Of course any incredibly hot potential partners can call me 24hrs a day. Seriously hand my number out. It's 0411...... LOL
Comment by Janet Collins
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Now there's rules for you. Glad to see you leave it open for a bit of extra-curricular fun
Thanks for the visit.
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Comment by Janet Collins
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it doesn't seem to be a problem with me either but I sometimes hear others complaining about it, hence the post.
Thanks for the visit.
Comment by sam sall
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in my country the dinner is late it is at 9 pm and then it is not appropriate to call in this time or beyond 9.
If WE had a call after 10 pm it is perceived as urgent.
But now with mobile age friends can call each other without disturbing the whole family...they can reach you at any time ,
Usually i put my phone silent when i don not want to receive ANY call especially at night when i want to sleep ,then i catch up on my missed calls
Comment by Janet Collins
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Dinner at 9? And I thought I ate late. Do kids eat this late too or do they eat earlier?
As you say, any calls that are late should only be urgent ones. Why else would you ring someone so late?
Comment by Wilson Pon
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For your information, I used to receive some prank calls (I still didn't know who's the moron was...), where he always called me in the 3 a.m. and wake me up to go to the bathroom!
What a psycho indeed!
Comment by Janet Collins
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You are a late night owl for phone calls. That's being pretty liberal as you can see by all the other comments. I am a "late-nighter" but I wouldn't really like to get a call that late - unless of course it was really important.
Thanks.
Comment by samaritan
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With me ringing other people, it depends who it is. I pretty much know the schedule of the people I tend to ring most and know when it's a bad time or a good time. If I'm ringing someone for the first time and don't know, I would probably have about 9.30 at the latest and not during dinner time if they have kids.
Samaritan